Chapter 01
This Was Never Just a Brand
MonkModern did not begin as a business idea.
It did not begin as a website, a content strategy, or a personal brand.
It began during a phase of life where nothing seemed to work.
When I look back now, I can see that MonkModern was not created in one single moment. It slowly formed through confusion, failure, self-observation, mentors, meditation, writing, digital marketing, money, astrology, decision-making, and lived experience.
At first, I did not know that all these things were connected.
I did not know that my interest in meditation, life management, design, digital marketing, money, astrology, psychology, and human behavior would one day come together under one idea.
That idea became MonkModern.
But before MonkModern found its name, I had to pass through a phase that forced me to search for something deeper than motivation.
I had to search for clarity.
Chapter 02
The Collapse That Started Everything
It started around 2018.
That was one of the worst phases of my life.
Mentally, I was collapsing. Nothing was working. It felt as if everything was going against me. I could not properly explain what was happening inside me. Even if someone had asked me, I would not have had the words to describe my condition.
Some feelings are difficult to explain because while you are going through them, you yourself do not understand them.
That was my state.
My friends noticed that something was wrong. They suggested drugs, alcohol, and cigarettes. At that time, I used to drink beer occasionally, so I agreed to beer. But when they suggested cigarettes, I immediately refused.
I clearly remember saying:
“I will choose to die, but I will not take cigarettes.”
That moment stayed with me.
It may sound dramatic, but for me, it was not drama. It was a boundary. Even in a broken mental state, some part of me still refused to fall completely.
That day, after drinking beer, I finally slept peacefully.
That sleep was necessary because I had not been able to sleep properly for days. It felt as if my brain could explode at any moment.
But that was also the last time I touched beer.
After that, I never drank it again.
When I look back, I can see how intense my condition was. I could not explain it to my friends. I could not explain it to my family. I could not even explain it to myself.
But something inside me wanted to understand.
So I took a pen and paper and started writing whatever was happening inside me.
I wrote my thoughts.
I wrote my feelings.
I wrote whatever confusion I could identify.
And it helped me.
That became one of the first tools of my life: writing as self-observation.
Even today, whenever I feel stuck or when I need to understand an unidentified feeling, writing helps me. It allows me to see my own mind from a little distance.
That was the first seed.
Not MonkModern yet.
But the first seed of self-observation.
Chapter 03
From Motivation to Clarity
When I started writing, questions began to appear.
At first, I was not even sure whether those questions made sense. But slowly, I started understanding my feelings better.
Then I began searching for answers.
But even then, I did not know what I was truly searching for.
Was I searching for answers?
Was I searching for relief?
Was I searching for motivation?
Or was I searching for clarity?
At that time, motivational speakers were very popular. I listened to a few of them. Some of their words helped me for a short time. They gave energy. They gave hope. They created a feeling that everything could become better.
But something was still missing.
Today, I understand the limitation of motivation more clearly.
Motivation comes and goes.
It feels good for a while, but it does not stay. It gives a temporary emotional high, but after some time, the same confusion returns.
What stays is clarity.
That is what I was actually searching for.
I was not searching only for motivation.
I was searching for clarity.
And this difference became very important later in my life.
Motivation can push you for a day. Clarity can guide you for years.
Chapter 04
The First Foundation: Life Management
During this search, I found my mentor, Anand Pradixit Sir.
He was an ex-civil servant who later became a teacher for civil service aspirants. But he was not only teaching subjects. He also spoke about life, lifestyle, discipline, routine, habits, relationships, socialization, money, and life management.
When I listened to him, I felt a real connection.
It was different from listening to motivational speakers.
There was something genuine in the way he spoke.
He used to tell students that studying alone is not enough to become what they want to become. A person needs a prepared mindset. A person needs discipline, consistency, and a managed life.
He explained that if your foundation is weak, success can surprise you, confuse you, or even destroy you.
That idea stayed with me.
Many people prepare for achievement. But very few prepare for the life that comes after achievement.
They prepare for exams, jobs, money, fame, or position.
But they do not prepare their mind.
They do not prepare their lifestyle.
They do not prepare their emotional system.
They do not prepare their relationships.
They do not prepare their habits.
Anand Sir spoke about life management from every angle: relationships, daily routine, habits, social circle, money, discipline, and mindset.
When he launched a full course on life management, I immediately joined it.
That course helped me a lot.
At that time, I did not realize that a foundation was being built inside me. I did not know that this foundation would later become one of the roots of MonkModern.
But something was forming.
A new version of me was being shaped.
Chapter 05
Meditation, Discipline, and Inner Work
During that phase, meditation became important for me.
I had already practiced meditation, especially around 2018 and 2019. I had studied it deeply. Anand Sir also taught a few techniques and always recommended meditation, even if only for five minutes a day.
For me, meditation was not just a spiritual activity.
It became a way to sit with myself.
It became a way to observe my thoughts.
It became a way to deal with the noise inside my mind.
At that time, I did not have the complete language to explain it. But now I can say that meditation helped me create distance from my own confusion.
It did not magically solve everything.
But it gave me space.
Space to breathe. Space to observe. Space to slowly understand myself.
This is important because MonkModern is not only about meditation.
But meditation was one of the first doors through which I entered the path of clarity.
Chapter 06
Digital Marketing and the First Website
After that, life moved into another timeline.
I became involved in designing. I designed graphics. Later, I joined a digital marketing course and then completed an internship.
While learning digital marketing, it became necessary to have my own website. It was not only for practice. We had to do real work. We had to build a website through WordPress and publish posts based on a niche.
At that age, I had very big dreams.
Some were genuine.
Some were fancy dreams that many young people carry.
I used to think I would do something nobody had done before. I would build something like Tesla or Facebook. I would become someone like Elon Musk or Mark Zuckerberg.
Later, I realized that these dreams were not completely wrong, but they were incomplete in the way I was imagining them.
Only dreaming is not enough.
Hard work alone is also not enough.
There are many factors behind extraordinary success, but most motivational speakers do not discuss them honestly.
They say everything is easy.
They say nothing is impossible.
They make you feel powerful for a moment. Your dopamine rises. You feel like you can do anything. Then you take action based on quotes and advice without understanding reality.
But when you step into the real world, you see the truth.
By that time, you may have already spent a lot of time, energy, and money.
That is why clarity is important.
Dreams need clarity. Without clarity, dreams can become distractions.
During the digital marketing course, I had to decide the niche for my website.
I spent almost a month trying to decide, but I could not reach any clear conclusion. The submission deadline was getting closer.
Then, with only a few days left, I decided to write about meditation.
The reason was simple.
I had practiced it.
I had studied it.
I had learned it from my mentor.
I could write about it without pretending.
That is how I started writing about meditation and lifestyle.
At that time, I was new to digital marketing. I did not properly understand the difference between a personal brand website and a business brand website. So I was doing both things on one website.
That website was asvphitesh.com.
At that time, I did not know it, but this became another foundation.
The first foundation was life management, meditation, and self-observation.
The second foundation was writing, website building, digital marketing, and publishing ideas online.
Again, MonkModern was not born yet.
But the ingredients were collecting.
Chapter 07
Money, Finance, and the Missing Piece
Later, I got some money and wanted to invest it in the stock market.
So I started gathering information and studying through YouTube videos by professionals and finance influencers.
Most of them were selling something: courses, services, advisory, or some kind of product. Since I was already learning digital marketing and designing, I was not interested in taking another course in stock market or finance. I thought maybe I should take a service from someone.
Then YouTube recommended a video by Amit Sir.
When I started watching his videos, I immediately felt a connection.
It was similar to what I had felt earlier with Anand Pradixit Sir.
I felt that this person was genuine and real.
The reason was not only that he talked about the stock market. He talked about money. He talked about relationships. He talked about social issues. He spoke about life from different angles.
That reminded me of Anand Sir, but with a different energy.
Anand Sir gave me life management, discipline, simplicity, and foundation.
Amit Sir brought money, strategy, financial awareness, and practical thinking into the picture.
At that time, I did not realize how important this would become.
But later, I understood that money was the missing piece in my earlier understanding.
Chapter 09
Why MonkModern Had to Exist
When I look back, I can see that MonkModern was born from multiple timelines and foundations.
- 01
The first foundation was 2018: mental collapse, writing, meditation, self-observation, and the search for clarity.
- 02
The second foundation was Anand Pradixit Sir: life management, discipline, habits, routine, mindset, and the idea of living like a monk without leaving the world.
- 03
The third foundation was digital marketing, designing, asvphitesh.com, and my first experience of writing and publishing online.
- 04
The fourth foundation was Amit Sir: money, finance, social issues, capitalism, and practical strategy.
- 05
The fifth foundation was astrology: not as blind prediction, but as a navigation tool for understanding oneself and making better decisions.
All of these came together slowly.
I never planned MonkModern in a single moment.
I never imagined that all these experiences were preparing something.
But now I can see that MonkModern is the result of clarity gained through learning, practice, mistakes, confusion, mentors, and life experiences.
It was also born because I needed a separate space.
asvphitesh.com had become confusing because I was trying to use it for both personal branding and broader content. I needed a separate website, but at first I did not have a clear purpose for it.
After meeting Amit Sir, learning across different domains, and especially understanding astrology as a navigation tool, I started gaining clarity more than ever before.
Somehow, I found the purpose that I was missing.
That purpose became the reason for the birth of MonkModern.
Chapter 10
MonkModern Is Not Escapism
Why MonkModern?
Why not any other name?
The answer goes back to something Anand Sir used to say.
He used to say: live like a monk.
But not in the traditional sense.
Not like someone who leaves everything, goes to the Himalayas or some secret place, cuts off from family, society, and the world, and lives as if he no longer exists for anyone.
I started questioning that idea.
If a monk leaves the world completely, what contribution is he making to the world?
What great work is he doing for society?
What value is he adding?
Maybe he is doing something for himself, but what about the world?
That made me think differently.
Maybe one can do a better job by becoming a monk without leaving family, people, and the modern world.
Being a monk does not necessarily mean escaping life.
It can mean becoming a modern monk.
A person who avoids unnecessary things.
- Unnecessary habits.
- Unnecessary relationships.
- Unnecessary meetings.
- Unnecessary social gatherings.
- Unnecessary noise.
- Unnecessary comparison.
- Unnecessary drama.
- Unnecessary mental clutter.
A modern monk creates private space wherever he lives.
He reads books.
He gains knowledge.
He listens to music.
He watches good movies.
He eats healthy food.
He drinks coffee if he likes.
He participates in the world, but he does not become consumed by it.
This is where MonkModern started making sense.
MonkModern is not about renouncing life. It is about refining life.
Chapter 11
The Middle Path
For a long time, I was focused on spirituality, celibacy, renunciation, meditation, and inner practices.
I received value from some of those practices, but slowly I realized that spirituality alone is not enough when you are living in the real world.
You also need practicality.
You need money.
You need decision-making.
You need responsibility.
You need the ability to handle stress.
This became clearer when I began understanding money more deeply.
Money is not everything, but money is important.
Money is power.
Money is position.
Money is energy.
When I practiced a more socialist mindset, I faced certain challenges. I realized that nobody cares how good you are if you do not have money. Even if people respect you, they will eventually remind you — directly or indirectly — that you do not have money.
That is a painful but practical truth.
Goodness without power often becomes helplessness.
But after understanding the importance of money, I also explored the capitalist mindset.
There is nothing wrong with capitalism.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to make money.
There is nothing wrong with ambition, business, growth, or financial independence.
But for me, I realized that I cannot live only for money.
Money solves many problems, but money also creates stress.
When you do not have money, there is stress.
When you start making money, there is also stress.
Money can be both the problem and the solution.
So the real question is not only:
How do I make money?
The deeper question is:
How do I handle stress while living, earning, building, and making decisions?
That is where the middle path becomes important.
The answer is neither blind spirituality nor ruthless capitalism.
The answer is not escapism.
The answer is not pressure.
The answer is not fake motivation.
The answer is a conscious middle path.
A path where spirituality gives grounding, money gives practicality, discipline gives structure, and clarity gives direction.
That is what MonkModern stands for.
Chapter 12
Purpose, Acceptance, and Surrender
You can have many things in life, but if you do not have purpose, something will still feel missing.
Purpose does not always have to be dramatic.
As a human being, purpose can simply mean value addition.
Adding value to your own life by learning something.
Adding value through meaningful experiences.
Adding value by doing something useful.
Adding value by helping someone make a better decision.
Adding value by helping someone navigate life with more clarity.
For me, MonkModern is important because it gives me purpose.
It gives me a reason to add value to someone else’s life.
I want to be very clear about this.
I do not want to hide behind the idea that I am doing MonkModern only because I want to transform people’s lives and people should say, “What a great person he is.”
No.
I am doing this for myself too.
Because helping others gives my life meaning.
When I help someone make a decision, understand themselves, manage their life, or navigate confusion, it also gives me clarity and purpose.
That is how MonkModern works for me.
That is why MonkModern plays such an important role in my life.
MonkModern also teaches acceptance and surrender.
Apart from purpose and value addition, we also need to understand suffering.
How do we deal with suffering?
How do we deal with mental pain?
How do we deal with the past?
How do we deal with regret, guilt, and emotional heaviness?
We cannot change everything.
We do not have full control over life.
Some things have already happened.
Some things cannot be undone.
Some people will not understand.
Some situations will not return.
Some wounds will not disappear instantly.
So what can we do?
We can accept.
We can surrender.
Acceptance does not mean weakness. Surrender does not mean defeat.
Acceptance means seeing reality as it is.
Surrender means giving up the illusion that we can control everything.
Surrender may not change what already happened, but it can give strength, courage, and willpower to move forward.
Sometimes the purpose of surrender is not to erase pain. Sometimes the purpose of surrender is to stop carrying the pain alone.